Kya arranged marriage aur Kya love marriage???

Kya arranged marriage aur Kya love marriage??? (One a lighter note, On one side Kuan and One one side khai :P India is my country, all Indians are my brothers and sisters except One. Let's find the One :D)

Finally, I am sitting with my laptop and writing about a very cliché topic which has haunted people for long:

Can one find love in an arranged marriage? or Can one arrange love?

During the time of our forefathers (Baba aajam ka jamana) love marriages were a taboo. People got married based on an odd picture or just a small conversation. The success of these marriages was pretty high owing to societal pressure and prejudices present in the society at that time.

The prejudices in the society more or less declined over a period of time. However, as evident, the society is still not over its love for arranged marriages.

What marks the difference between the two times, then and now is not just a change in the thinking of the masses, the liberal attitude has provided many people with an opportunity to love and then marry their love. The bigger difference is the status of the women folk. In the past women were home makers and in the modern world they are much more than that. The women are more evolved than ever, more educated and have a greater say in the family.

As such, the parents who cared for their children and did not allow them to talk to strangers when they were young, wake up one fine day and find that it’s time for their kids to get married and settled. Then starts the blind hunt for the perfect match. The IT industry is playing a big role in the search now a days and thanks to the search engines you are just a click away from your perfect match. The fact that there are so many choices at your disposal makes it even more complex and adds to the pressure of finding a better match. The search for a partner soon turns into a competitive battle.

My child got 99% in maths, 98% in physics and 97% in chemistry and got a scholarship for going to XYZ College. Yeah! Of course he did that!!! That’s why he never found a girl and you are sitting and finding a girl for him. ;)

There are advantages of this shift in paradigm. The traditions remain intact although with added competition. I wonder when parents will start taking written exams of candidates suitable for their children :P. There are less chances that the partner will fail to keep up with the family structure and values which is more likely to happen in love marriages. Also in the current state of the society you get so many choices that even the children can make an educated guess for the kind of partner they need. The kids are more intelligent now a days and given a sufficient amount of time and choice they can make a better choice.

    

It’s a win win situation, you can create a partner preference, talk to multiple people and finally marry the beautiful girl or the rich guy :P :P

Love marriages no doubt can last long in a liberal society but given the current situation it will definitely remain a less preferred option due to the so called values and traditions. You fall in love and then remain in love, it’s a less likely proposition in itself, and then convince the society that you can marry each other and then live happily forever. It’s not tough to declare arranged marriage as an obvious winner over love marriage.

You find a match for two single people who owing to various reasons could not find or stick to their love. You have dating sites in the west and matrimony sites for this purpose in India :D

Find two likeminded people and they will fall in love. Love grows with a relationship and respect for the other. You can’t arrange love that’s true but two strangers can definitely fall in love. Whether you can find a person who can spend time with you and remain in a committed relationship before you get married is your luck.

 Ultimately the success of either form of marriage is not guaranteed. (Mehengai ke jamane me guarantee ki ummeed na Karen ;) )

Admonitory: Any reference to a person married or unmarried is totally unintentional. The above are just the views of the author and you can completely ignore them in case you got married to the beautiful girl or the rich guy. If not then happy searching.